WonderLust by Nikki Alfar

Author:Nikki Alfar [Alfar, Nikki]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9789712730573
Publisher: Anvil Publishing, Inc.
Published: 2014-08-14T16:00:00+00:00

“GREAT AND GLORIOUS One,” she says, smiling brightly as she makes sure her blazer is still draped discreetly over the Glock 26 tucked into the small of her back—the 23 is in her shoulder holster, of course; there’s a reason operatives like wearing jackets, and it isn’t to present a majestic visage. “I hate to rush you, but there are people after us, and—”

“Thou wert the one, handmaiden, who didst suggest abandoning yon self-propelling chariot,” he says, not even gazing up from the pastry display to look at her.

Then again, no one is looking at her; the salesgirl is all but draped over the glass counter to drool at him, which is what happens to salespeople everywhere. Lee’s decided that this constitutes evidence of divinity, only to the extent that anyone who looks like the lovechild of Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise would be likely to elicit this effect.

“That was because a car which looks like an accordion isn’t much use in evading pursuit.” She’s keeping her voice down; she figures one of them ought to, and it’s never going to be him. “And I know I said we needed to lie low for a while and just wait to be picked up, but it’s been over an hour, G.A.G.O., and this is hardly an ideal place. We need to keep moving.”

“How canst thou say such locale be less than idyllic?” he booms. “Only feast thine eyes upon the beauty contained herein, beloved Lee!”

The salesgirl, who was beaming at the “beauty herein” bit, is now glaring daggers at her over the “beloved Lee” part.

“He means ‘beloved’ like people love their dogs.” She doesn’t know why she feels the need to explain these things.

“Ah, the simple yet elegant lusciousness that doth be vanilla!” he continues. “The velvety excess that maketh chocolate decadence! And, oh—What doth piña colada be again, handmaiden?”

“Pineapple—a tart and sweet, but not citrusy tropical fruit—coconut, and alcohol, Great and Glorious One.” She’s annoyed, naturally, at having to define the flavor profile of a cocktail-inspired cupcake for him, while they are technically, if hardly literally, on the run, but she learned quickly that pressuring him accomplishes absolutely nothing positive. Even so, she’s severely tempted—as she often is, but never does—to hit him.

Judging from the red dot dancing around his pristinely-un-mussed locks—despite their having come from a car wreck, previously—so does someone else.

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